Oh what a season

So Blogger decides that it is going to change its stuff. I finally had a chance to sit down at the comptuer last night, and I couldn't log onto Blogger because it had to transfer everything over to the Google beta version. So that leaves me posting at work, which I never usually have a chance to do. On my last post, I had just gotten my new shift after the shift bids. Well, a couple weeks later I had to opportunity to move onto a 24 hr shift out of Garland. So I am only required to work 2 days a week now, but I work much more than that for the benefit of the OT. I love OT pay. And I also love not working OT and having all that time at home. I am working today, and I had the last two days off, and I truly enjoyed sitting at home, watching TV and getting my apartment cleaned up. The cleanliness of my apartment had been declining gradually since I was never home, and I am fighting an uphill battle trying to keep it clean.

I am still engaged to Jeremy, which may seem obvious, but we have had a couple of fights lately, and considering how I feel after those fights, it is still a testament to our commitment that we are still together. We went away together last weekend to Fredricksburg, Tx. It was a trip for his Texas history class, but it was also a nice opportunity to leave our families and all their drama behind, get away from our lives, and just to be together having fun. It was great fun. We went to the Admiral Nimitz museum (National museum for the War in the Pacific), the Pioneer Museum, and the Living history museum (nearer to Johnson City). Of course, we couldn't skip Enchanted Rock. It wasn't a difficult climb, but it sure does wind you if you aren't used to walking up a 30-45 degree incline. We also had time to just be with each other and talk; time which seems to be rare.

I feel like I should apologize for being an absentee blogger. My life has been hectic and emotionally unstable for the last couple of months. I have been working lots and lots of overtime, and on top of that, Jeremy's mom just lost her job, and my parents are getting divorced. In the divorce, I can't help but side with Jerry (obvious to anyone who knows my relationship with my mother) but my mother has been trying to manipulate me in the meantime, and I have just decided to discontinue my relationship with her and cut off all contact (actually that was HER idea) until such a time as she can fix her problems and apoligize for what she has most recently done to me. I find myself playing more of a mother role to Rachael and Joey since they too have decided they want nothing to do with my mom. So yeah, things are crazy and tumultuous. But I am persevering.

With Thanksgiving coming up, I am being forced to face my mother again. We decided not to let her host dinner this time. The last time we trusted her to host a family meal was Rosh Hashanah, and she decided to ruin it. We were all going to be about 15 minutes late (me because i was getting out of work late) so she threw a fit and said we were ruining dinner so she cancelled it. We decided this time it would be better for Jerry's mother to host it. I was under the impression that she would not be coming, considering the court injunction about her not being allowed to see Rachael and Joey, but Jerry invited her anyways. So now I have spend the day with her. Against my will. I have decided that since she told me that she did not ever want to see or speak to me again, I would honor her wishes and ignore her until such a time as she decided to apologize and decide she wanted to have contact with me. Jerry says she is doing better now that she is taking anti-depressants, but I don't expect much of a sincere change. I suppose we will have to see how it will go.